"I always knew when I graduated from high school, I'd go to college. I never thought about what I was walking away from... I just wanted to study literature and writing."

"I've been told by many people that if I had a Twitter account, I would be making five hundred thousand dollars more a year."

"I don't know how people do this waxing thing. Now I just have all these bumpy ingrown hairs."

"Acting was something that I grew up just doing. I certainly never thought about it."

"I think the person who takes a job in order to live - that is to say, for the money - has turned himself into a slave."

"I think one of the reasons people quit is because they're afraid they won't be able to get better and better; that they have to come to a zenith of some kind."

"All the things that happen to people in the industry today, the actors, what they have to put up with, all the people wanting to know every single moment of their lives - I think it's really sad."

"I'm not good at anything except writing jokes. I wasn't good at sports, I wasn't good at anything artsy, ever. I think there was a real worry for a while about what I would be good at. I was just this chubby little Indian kid who looked like a nerd."