"Inappropriateness is funny to me. Rudeness is hilarious."

"That show, 'The Amazing Race' - is that about white people?"

"I understand Tea Partyers' anger with the system, but they are in way over their heads and often racially motivated, and I can't be part of that."

"We all know how funny Morrissey is. Actually, you know what? I say that sarcastically. His songs are some of the funniest songs I've ever heard in my life. I mean, really. I mean, not that the 'Girlfriend in a Coma' is, like, really funny."

"The idea of confidence, of the emotions of the population, is an incredibly important one in economics. John Maynard Keynes called it 'animal spirit.' And if people are feeling generally good about the future, they're more likely to spend money, to start new companies; companies are more likely to hire people, make investments."

"A very wise author once said that a writer writes for himself, and then publishes for money. I write for myself and publish just for the reader."

"In my opinion MS is a lot better at making money than it is at making good operating systems."

"I buy about $1,500 worth of papers every month. Not that I trust them. I'm looking for the crack in the fabric."